I focuse on the comic, leaving the grammatical warfare. I don't want to be see as a rude person, but the drawing really needs practice. It is not very clear, even confused per moment. The foreshortenings are not good but it still a very delicate thing to master, even for pros, so no need to worry. In fact it is rather a question of practicing and taking time (And it is a guy who draw almost a page of comic per day who said that, shame on me). But I see a good potential on these pages. Don't feel discourage by what a breast elargement obsessed artist asshole wrote.
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