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Suggestions
On one hand, I get exceptionally annoyed when people do nothing but shower praise on an art piece that, well, needs work.
But being a dick is being a dick. The fact that it's porn doesn't mean it's a good idea to throw ethics out the window. This has been remarked on several times already. It's nice to see repercussions for the behaviour.
That having been said, the best advice I can give is to use a reference. Lots of good advice has been given for the specifics, but here's a bit for becoming a better artist. Practice, practice, practice to develop the skills needed with your hands and sketch over photos to start getting an eye for anatomy. Mass in the shapes with the broad side of your conte/pencil/wacom/whatever. When I was in college, we were taught to squint at what we were looking at until it divided into three or four definable shades for us. It helps quite a bit. Good luck!
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