How about this fix?
Quote:
Right now your changes can be seen, and remembered, by those around you.
This blessing will circumvent the memory and events around you so that
you will not have fallout with co-workers or friends, however anyone that has been affected by the curse prior to this blessing will still remember their encounter, and will continue to remember if you have a future encounter with them. Other than previous relations your life will simply go on as normal.
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I intended originally for Lilah to come off as straightforward and an ally, however I think i like the way she comes off as still looking out for her sisters first, as shown with the bit of cosmic agreement on the back of the note.
I see what you mean by the observation point of view. This is probably in part to me putting a reflective surface in the transformations, or having the other party watch (such as with jason), that I see it through their eyes but not feel it. I'll try a different approach with the next chapter.
I do want to make the transformations the highlight. Honestly, writing those scenes satisfies my tg desires more than the sex scenes, hell that's why I started writing tg.
With the mental, thanks a lot. I'm not a fan of heavy mental changes, bimbofication specifically. To notice its subtlety tells me a lot as a writer.
Thanks a ton for the feedback.