..... I just posted a review, clicked to reply and the damn thing had logged me out. So, I get to try to type this again! I liked this story more than your Egyptian one. And, based on your writing, I think you liked it more, too. It felt like you had fun writing this one as it flowed a lot better. The bits of humor in dialogue helped a lot and I liked Charlie as a character. She has a good personality. The action sequences were well done and I could follow it easily.
Logically, the doctor's plan was problematic but this isn't supposed to be a realistic story, right?
I read it more as a pulp action/adventure story and that helped a lot to be in the right mindset for it. Oh, and at the end, I don't like that she could escape by crashing through the ceiling. Again, because I visualize the story as I read it and I try to make it make sense, the room was locked down and it was probably concrete and other things between floors - she was in flight with no way to brace herself so actually breaking through like that... I had a problem with it.
So, critically... spelling and grammar are still occasionally wrong. There are occasional word misuse and awkwardness. One example being the word "buttcheeks" when describing the transformation. It's more of a juvenile word and doesn't fit the tone of your story. The transformation wasn't as well described as I'd like to see and I got lost a bit while reading it. One of the bigger problems I had was during Charlie's backstory. You had her actually speak what happened to her so that wasn't well done. There was nobody there with her so there's no reason for her to do it - should've just folded the changes into the storyline.
So, yeah! I hope that helps!