Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain Ash
I feel sorry for Stacy.
Okay, she has rejected a guy but that's not a reason to hunt her down that badly.
I wish this Jim had a better motive.
What I've missed was how Jim could use this remote without getting noticed by Stacy.
Another thing I've missed, did Jim expected her at the mall, or was it coincident.
But now to the good parts:
I've liked the description of her slowly shrinking and how more and more her clothes became baggy.
As a reader I could imagine how it would be into Stacy's skin right now.
The smartphone messaging added the creepy factor who shrunk her.
This was a really nice short story, unfortunately without a happy end.
But nonetheless I have enjoyed reading it.
Thank you for sharing.
Greetings
Captain Ash
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Thank you for reading! The beginning and motive was much longer. Jim was a bit more stalker-ish in the first draft. I took it out to focus on the shrinking. Things I need to work on for next story so thank you for the criticism.