Thanks.
Some stories to look for on the AR Archive for unbirthing are:
'The Device' (the one about two scientists testing an age-changing invention. Also includes gradual memory-erasure from the AR.)
'Just the Right Size' (it's posted with each chapter as a separate story, and only has male AR with a woman doing real-life techniques to make herself lactate)
'The Three Fates of Shinji Ikari' (incomplete story I wrote that was a sort of 'choose your adventure' story with three different chapters after the 'beginning' chapter, each being a different thing that happens to Shinji Ikari of Evangelion. One chapter involved male AR with unbirthing to the point of conception and female AR to 18yrs old. The other completed chapter involved Male-to-Female TG and Female-to-Male TG.)
'Wish Fulfillment' (corny and very Wapanese yuri story I wrote. Involves old age AR eventually ending with unbirthing to a few weeks old in the womb or so. Be warned, VERY wapanese. I'm serious. I don't know what I was thinking with how I wrote that story...-___- 0)
As for male AR that leaves the guy at the mercy of his female partner, there's a few, but one I'll point out is on the AR Archive's forum in separate topics for each chapter called 'Dreams and Desires'. I'm mentioning that one because there's middle age woman to sexy woman AR in it. There's also a story on the old AR Story Archive called 'The Reflecting Pool' found
HERE, that has mostly male AR but there's female AR at the end too.
As for AR with behavior-modification, 'Tongue Strips' on the AR Archive fits that to a degree. Also, check the forum there for a story-draft titled "Hot for Teacher" (there's a mom to teenage valley-girl AR). Also,
Chronos Continuum has that too with a age/time-modifying remote that can give user the option of changing the person's memory to think they're that age and behave as such with memories somewhat intact still.
It's late, I'll be happy to post more links and suggestions later if you want.