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Unread 02-24-2018   #13
Random_X
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Re: A Little too Much

If you ever rewrote the ending and perhaps expanded on the universe, I think you'd have a real winner on your hands.

I hate to join the rest of the group, but I went from bookmarking this post to deleting it by the end. It's your world though, create it as you see fit!
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Unread 02-25-2018   #14
Captain Ash
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Re: A Little too Much

For those who have never read "little by little", I'd describe why the girl are shrinking.
I agree with the others that the ending was not great, especially since I'm not a fan of vore.

A little more detail why Becky wanted to shrink Jessica that badly would be nice.
I prefer stories where characters have a motive why they want to shrink someone.
Lust? Revenge? Teaching her a lesson or just for fun?
Its these little details.
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Unread 02-25-2018   #15
Prof_Sai
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Re: A Little too Much

Why does she keep shrinking when the lust turns to horror?
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Unread 02-25-2018   #16
Rebikan
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Re: A Little too Much

Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain Ash View Post
For those who have never read "little by little", I'd describe why the girl are shrinking.
I agree with the others that the ending was not great, especially since I'm not a fan of vore.

A little more detail why Becky wanted to shrink Jessica that badly would be nice.
I prefer stories where characters have a motive why they want to shrink someone.
Lust? Revenge? Teaching her a lesson or just for fun?
Its these little details.
Agreed with Captain here. Treating the shrinking as a fully fleshed out comeuppance can make the shrinking that much more interesting. Say if Jessica had used to bully Becky, or had done some thing unforgivable to her that warranted this response.

Either way the murder is a bit of a turnoff, but I totally get the setting of a girl being shrunk by a rival. It's very sexually enticing, especially if the girl shrinking finds out she likes it!
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Unread 02-25-2018   #17
Vicky Mouse
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Re: A Little too Much

Why do people like vore at all?
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Unread 02-25-2018   #18
qzar9999
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Re: A Little too Much

Quote:
Originally Posted by Prof_Sai View Post
Why does she keep shrinking when the lust turns to horror?
"Little By Little" vaguely established that the shrinking itself functions as an aphrodisiac, and if a girl goes too far down she basically loses all control. That could explain it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vicky Mouse View Post
Why do people like vore at all?
I've never understood that, myself. But the fact is that some folks do. *shrug*

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rebikan View Post
Agreed with Captain here. Treating the shrinking as a fully fleshed out comeuppance can make the shrinking that much more interesting. Say if Jessica had used to bully Becky, or had done some thing unforgivable to her that warranted this response.
Raso, this is a great suggestion. Rather than revising your ending, you could consider revising your *beginning,* making it so that Jessica deserves what she gets. That would take a lot of the tragic bite out of it.
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Unread 02-28-2018   #19
Marauder727
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Re: A Little too Much

Quote:
Originally Posted by OhZone View Post
...You should see what I did to the rewrite of "Inch By Inch." ha
Oh really? *Says the author of said rewrite*

Marauder727
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Unread 02-28-2018   #20
Raso719
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Re: A Little too Much

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Originally Posted by Marauder727 View Post
Oh really? *Says the author of said rewrite*

Marauder727

I'd be interested in seeing this...
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Unread 02-28-2018   #21
OhZone
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Re: A Little too Much

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marauder727 View Post
Oh really? *Says the author of said rewrite*

Marauder727

Hmmmmm. o_O You don't look like TDLAmador. But of course, qzar9999 doesn't look like the Beast either. ha


Inch by Inch - Original story by Steve Colburn - Revised by TDLAmador - Copy3x

http://www.imgpuppy.com/images/2018/...809e7c6421.jpg

I read the story through. Enjoy it. then I just highlight the hott process parts for me. Then I save it as an html so I can use scrolly fox to auto scroll it. But I don't share it like that. It's just for me. For maximum funz! :P
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