![]() |
![]() |
#13 |
Frequent Poster
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 368
|
Re: Yard Work Part Two
Wow, thanks for all the comments! I'm especially glad to hear the detailed criticisms because it reinforces that readers want to see a level of "believability" in the story. I agree that little things like pacing, consistent body size, how different characters react to the chemicals, etc. are important, so I really tried to get that right.
Of course there is a certain amount of literary license here. Amy might have taken longer to grow up because she was younger in the first place, or maybe Nicole sprayed herself with a stronger dose of Weed Shrinker? Thanks also for all of great ideas for this comic - right now the script is pretty much completed for the next few parts. Assuming that sales go well, I might try doing other variations on the theme in the future. I'm definitely taking notes, so if there are particular scenarios you want to see please let me know! |
![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#14 | |
Perverted Asexual
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: In the grand state of Denial
Posts: 1,299
|
Re: Yard Work Part Two
Well, Dreamtales I'd like to add some comments too.
First off, even though most of us here prefer female AR/AP exclusively, I found it refreshing to have male AR in this story. I also liked how this wasn't another redux of the Lauren and Betsy theme of the younger sister outgrowing the older sister (that was why I enjoyed Splash a bit). Adding the mother and girl-nextdoor Nicole was also a nice change of pace. Don't get me wrong, Lauren and Betsy have their place in your comics, but Yard Work is seriously your most polished AR/AP work I've read so far (haven't read Au Pair, so I can't speak for that).
__________________
DA Account: Crash-Ichimonji Quote:
|
|
![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#15 |
Process Fan
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 40
|
Re: Yard Work Part Two
Im normally on the 'Dreamtales comics arent for me' bandwagon, but I am very glad I decided to give this series a try!
Better than the first, and more of what I was hoping to see. There was good process, and I enjoyed seeing an ARed Luke and Nicole instead of just everyone outpacing Luke. It actually made the parting scene where she did outpace him much more enjoyable, honestly. Im assuming that shot at the end was a mistake on someones part, am I hoping for too much that it was female hormones by accident? Either way, I like where this is going, and am looking forward to the next issue, and hope there is more after that! Its not often I find a comic this large where there there is both frequent process and good nudity with very well drawn art and above average dialog. Even rarer, I think the teasing and other reactions from Nicole is more on the believable side, rather than the instantaneous 'tables have turned and your helpless' kind of thing. Cant wait for the next part! ![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#16 |
Frequent Poster
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 327
|
Re: Yard Work Part Two
The artwork is really great. My only nitpick is a lack of consistency between panels. Breasts, waists and butts change size and shape without any transformation having taken place, especially for Nicole.
I think it's about time the mom reacts to her face obviously looking 20 years younger and like a supermodel. I mean, really react to it. "Why don't I have any wrinkles anymore? Why do I suddenly have an angular face?" That's not the kind of thing you merely smile about and then shrug off. Also, what would happen if she got doused with the Super Gro formula a second time? Can she become even more youthful and pretty? ![]() It's about time someone figures out what is causing the changes, regardless of whether they decide to tell the others or use it for scheming. It would be a nice change if Luke went all-out on a male power fantasy and sprayed himself with Super Gro, growing bigger and more muscular than ever. Then he could plot to expose his sister to the weed shrinker. Last edited by bstgate; 07-07-2013 at 05:59 AM. |
![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#17 |
Frequent Poster
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 368
|
Re: Yard Work (Part Three complete)
Yard Work Part Three is ready!
More family fun as Luke and Amy battle it out. In Part Three: Luke and Amy get in a wrestling match; More growth from Amy and shrinkage from Luke; Water battle! Mom and Amy versus little Luke; Luke gets an eyeful when he walks in on Amy taking a shower. You can get more info and buy the comic here: Yard Work Part Three You can see all the parts of Yard Work here. |
![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#18 |
Process Fan
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 60
|
Re: Yard Work (Part Three complete 8/1/13)
I must say, as much as I loved Parts 1 & 2, I really didn't like Part 3 much at all :x I'll hold off on saying more until a few others chime in so I can figure out if I'm alone or if others agree
Maybe if during the water battle, the sister or mother had been accidentally AR'd to some degree like what happened with the neighbor in Part 2, that might have helped. As it stands, I'm glad I'm supporting the project and DreamTales itself, but I would've felt much more comfortable if I'd only had to pay $5 or $7 for it, whereas I was more than happy with the price on the others >.< Last edited by bubbleman; 08-01-2013 at 08:18 AM. |
![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#19 | |
The Incorrigible Author
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Richmond, Virginia
Posts: 581
|
Re: Yard Work (Part Three complete 8/1/13)
Quote:
The first one was good. The second one in my opinion was better. I buy just about all AR/AP stories from D.T. and I thought this was the story to break the mold. Now... that's not to say it's bad. Just not as good as part 1 & 2. I've also finally figured out what puts me off about this art. With Bojay when the characters get younger, you can clearly tell it in the face and body. Even in the men. With Luke getting younger his face just doesn't seem to be getting youthful. There's no real pudge to his face. Granted an boy of his age could be slim, but I would expect some baby fat on him. or less defined cheeks and the like. I also realized something else, based on the way the formula's are working, the mother must have bought gallons of this stuff. They seem to leave this formula/water on all the time. Now I'm merely guessing at this point, since from what I can tell of the squirt cans there is no gauge to decide how much to put in. So 1 drop per gallon could very well mean that has an almost negligible effect. Which if that's the case a direct exposure should more or less kill anyone who touches them. Regressing or aging out of existence. So imagine what this is doing to the other creatures in the area. Dogs, cats squirrels, birds and insects would be interacting with the residue or the run off of these products. Let's assume they don't work with non human DNA. But what about when the stuff evaporates into the air? Unless those chemicals are improperly bonded to the water molecules, which we have to assume they are at least hitching a ride, when they break down and get put into the air and then become rain what happens to the other humans in the area? Anyway, I guess only part 4 will tell us more. But I'd like to see the effects to the people around them by their recklessness. I mean, they essentially have a biological/chemical weapon that they're releasing into the world with the way they're letting those chemicals run freely.
__________________
Find me at... The Incorrigible Author, Smashwords, Amazon, Facebook, Twitter, Google + or Google +, Pintrest, Tumblr, Deviant Art, Steam, Twitch, YouTube, Goodreads "One of the common failings among honorable people is a failure to appreciate how thoroughly dishonorable some other people can be, and how dangerous it is to trust them" - Thomas Sowell "Though I am always in haste, I am never in a hurry." - John Wesley "But it's an easy fix. One line of dialogue. 'Thank God we invented the... you know, whatever device.'" - Rob Lowe, Thank you for Smoking |
|
![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#20 |
Process Fan
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 66
|
Re: Yard Work (Part Three complete 8/1/13)
Really enjoyed this one as well! Love how Luke is looking younger. Did the mother get a little younger at the end?
|
![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#21 |
Occasionally Appears
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 35
|
Re: Yard Work (Part Three complete 8/1/13)
Part 3 is definitely more of a Female AP Male AR story than Part 2 was, which I think had a good mix. As far as part three is concerned, I agree it wasn't as good as part 2 was, but a good part of that is due to personal preference (much preferring female AR, which part 2 had a fantastic sequence for), and the story didn't seem to go quite as far. Overall, it didn't feel like quite as much bang for my buck, but as always, I continue to support dreamtales and his comics.
Depending on your tastes, I suppose I can recommend it. If you really enjoy female AP, then you'll probably enjoy part 3 quite a bit. As for me, I'll hold out hope that there will be more female AR in the future for this series. |
![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#22 | |
Frequent Poster
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 368
|
Re: Yard Work (Part Three complete 8/1/13)
Quote:
[Spolier Alert] Not to give away too much, but the remaining parts will be more focused on female growth, mini-GTS and male shrinking. There will be more of Luke pretending to be a kid, too. There's no more female AR planned as of now, but I am thinking of continuing the series with a sequel much more focused on AR, both male and female. This would be kind of a "reboot" plot as I've done with the various Betsy and Lauren comics. However, in order to be able to afford to do a sequel, I need to finish this one successfully, so any support is much appreciated. |
|
![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#23 |
Frequent Poster
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 218
|
Re: Yard Work (Part Three complete 8/1/13)
Hey Dreamtales, I was wondering when the next part of Puberty Fairies will be out?
|
![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
#24 |
Frequent Poster
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 302
|
Re: Yard Work (Part Three complete 8/1/13)
I found it a quite good read, although less so than the previous one, but a good comic which I appreciated nonetheless.
Keep the good work! This being said, you seriously should work on Luke's face features. I t look really weird to see it no on part with his body. Mainly concerning his side whiskers. |
![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
|
|